Shock Spam Advertising
Along the same lines as A Bad Choice of Title...
Dear Hilary Aldrich:
I thought I had seen all the variations of spamvertising. Pleading with me to increase my penis size; insulting me to increase me penis size! Demanding I buy cheap software. Trumpeting great home mortgage deals tailored just for me! Teasing me with tales of amorous and lonely housewives and their cheerleader daughters!
*jerk off motion*
Yawn, right? What is a spamvertiser supposed to do once the market is saturated with the worst examples of businessmen and women (I use the terms loosely) holding out their hands for customers' money? With spam filters as they are these days, all I have to do is check one folder and give it a quick glance to make sure I'm not deleting a message that actually has worth to me. The understanding of this reality has got to pain you and your brethren worse than the first time your noble profession got slapped with the "spam" label.
So what is to be done?
How about just going straight for the shock value? And not just any shock value, but something that'll just JUMP RIGHT AT 'EM:
From: "Hilary Aldrich"Whoa now! That's the spot; there's something that'll get my attention. Tickle my racism nerve. Yank on it so that I can't resist to see what slimy bastard things you have to say about blacks. I wonder: how did the e-mail of a blatant racist get in my spam box? Further: when did I become black? Hesitation evaporates!
To: drizz@drizzten.com
Subject: hey nigger
Date: Sun, 03 Oct 2004 11:38:22 -0800
*click*
We have a loan program available for almost every scenario.
you'll see that we take great pride in helping you buy or your home.
and we have the best quotes in the industry - guaranteed. Challenge us today!
access our short *FORM* here...
Alas, you want to sell loans. Another wanker.
*delete*