Why Society Must Change First

[Updates below.]

Often, I wonder what the actual stages of progress we must move through in order to proceed to an ideal capitalist society. Do we first tackle trade restrictions? Roll back taxes en masse? Pull out of the Drug War?

Wired's front page has a feature called Furthermore, and today's edition makes me think the answer is a wholesale change in the public's attitude towards the use of government power.

The Incredible Bulk
Even at six, Leah Lowland knew there was something amiss with the Incredible Hulk doll she won at a seaside fair in England. Noticing a prominent bulge at the front of her prize, Leah did what any curious six-year-old would do: She pantsed him. An lo, there in all its green-felted splendor, she discovered a two-inch male organ -- a willy, as the Brits like to call it. "Considering the doll is only 12 inches tall, it's amazing how big his willy is," said mom Kim. "And it’s definitely not an extra piece of material left on by mistake." Amazed she may have been, but mom is calling for a ban on the Hulk doll, made by a Spanish manufacturer as a tie-in with the new movie.

E! Online has a roundup and Ananova si also carrying the story.

A six-year-old girl who won an Incredible Hulk doll at a seaside fair, found it came complete with a penis.

Leah Lowland found the two-inch penis after checking out the doll's mystery bulge under the comic-book character's ripped purple shorts.

Her mother Kim said the toy was one of several prizes she could choose after Leah knocked down cans with bean bags at the fair on Brighton Pier.

The doll is made by a firm based in Valencia, Spain.

But she chose the doll because she thought Leah would like it amid publicity about the new Hulk movie, says The Sun.

Kim, from Biggin Hill, Kent, says the dolls should be banned. "A hulk with a bulk like this just shouldn't be allowed. Considering the doll is only 12-inches tall it's amazing how big his willy is."

*cough*

"It's offensive. It should be banned."

"But lots of things are offensive to lots of people. Should they all be banned?"

"Of course not. However in this case, it should be obvious the toy is inappropriate for young children to have. I'd say it's even inappropriate for anyone under the age of 18."

"But that's your personal opinion. Should we set our laws according to your personal opinion of morality? In my opinion, there is more harm in neutering human sexuality for our children for they become less equipped to handle sexaul situations in the future."

"Well, I certainly don't want my children exposed to such filth. It's my right to decide how my children learn about sex, not through chance encounters with anatomically correct dolls. I'm certain a majority of people would agree with me. The doll is just revolting."

"If a majority of people agreed with me, would you still use that rationalization?"

"..."

"What if I were to tell you no one - not a shocked parent, not a vote-whoring politician, not a screaming torch mob - has the right to tell that company they are not allowed to make their toys anymore? That just as it's wrong for police to storm your house without a justifiable reason, it's wrong to reduce someone's right to their property to the level of mere steward in the face of someone's outrage?"

"I'd tell you you're full of shit."

"I find that offensive."

UPDATE(7/10/2003 4:20am)
Pictures, for the curious, can be found here.

UPDATE 10/8/2004 5:01pm
For those searching for "Bush's Mystery Bulge" during the first Presidential Debate, you won't find anything here. I suggest reading a Salon article to learn more.

Posted by Drizzten at July 09, 2003 06:36 PM