November 04, 2002
Rabid Windshield Wipers

Look. Austinites. Just a quick comment. I know you probably give less than a dogshit about my opinions, and especially regarding something so superficially trivial as this, but I gotta say something.

I know it's been raining for like the last two weeks and you're tired, sick of, and put out with the cold drizzle we're being subjected to by the forces of Nature. The dull gray sky melding with the dull gray roads mixing with our dulled and grayed senses. The ho-hum of the same shit transparently smacking our faces and windows and drip-dripping ouside our bedrooms. It's monotonous.

...

So stop making up for it by running your windshield wipers at FULL FUCKING STEAM when there's less than the sweat from a soda can coming down.

...

OHMYGAWD. I'm at stoplights on the way home from work and I have to deal with the violent juxtaposition of seeing scores of slack-jawed commuters staring with equally mindless eyes out through a windshield where the wipers are set at such a furious pace that I find myself in awe towards the overwhelming technical prowess of the automotive engineers who can fashion these unilateralist Squeegees of Death.

Please, think about using the other settings on the damn control.



Posted by Drizzten at November 04, 2002 05:59 PM

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